Does It Make Me Less of a Mother? Part I: My C-Section Preference

Being a 25-year-old fairly new mother,  I have a ton of people in my social network who are pregnant and new mothers. Through all of those people I have seen several different opinions/ideas in regards to birth, breastfeeding and child rearing. Both birth and breastfeeding are very hot topics for new mothers, especially breastfeeding. Being respectful is sometimes difficult when I read and hear other people's opinions regarding these topis especially when I disagree with them. I totally understand that it is okay for everyone to have their own opinion but, I don't think that other people do. While I know that Nylah has the best mother, when I hear certain comments I sometimes second guess myself and my decisions.

While I was pregnant I discussed with my husbnad my fear of having a vaginal birth. Tying that makes me feel a little crazy...lol. Why? Well, I am a woman and women have been delivering babies vaginally and drug free since the beginning of time. And I wanted NOTHING to do with neither of those oprions for 2 simple reasons. One, I know that my pain tolerance is not very high so I knew that I would be opting for meds. I couldn't imagine myself in agony for too long. And secondly, I was afraid of vaginal tearing and having to receive stitches. I have heard some horor stories about that and it really scared me! Now don't get me wrong, I didn't want a c-section either but the baby had to some out some way and in weighing the pros and cons of both, I felt that it would be better for me. I mentally prepared myself for both but was secretly relieved when my daughter was delivered early via c-section.

I have no problem with sharing my birth story and how great my c-section was but I sometimes get crazy looks when I say that I preferred my c-section. Women tell me how they wanted to hold out as long as possible in hopes to avaoid a c-section and I do not understand why. I've heard pregnant women speak of c-sections negatively and how they will do it the "natural" way and I don't understand it. I may be jumping to conclusions but it seems to me that some women feel that the decision to have a vaginal birth is better than a c-section. But, for what reason? Am I supposed to want a giant baby to squeeze out of my body simply because I am a woman? Or, I won't feel a connection to my baby if they don't come through the birth canal? Or maybe it's the scar that scares some. I am so very curious as to what people think. As I stated above, I am very content with my c-section but I'm just wondering if I am missing something.

Quick & Easy Frozen Birthday!

My little sister turned 4 back in November and my parents had no idea what they wanted to do with her. But since her birthday fell on a Saturday we knew that we should do something fun. A few days before her birthday she suffered a serious injury to one of her fingers so her parents were afraid to take her out of the house to do anything since she wasn't wearing  a cast but her finger was still in pretty bad shape. Me being me and LOVING parties the way that I do decided that I would go and buy some decorations, make a cake and have a little party at her house with just family. My sister and my daughter are the only kids in the family but they play together pretty well because my Nylah thinks she is 3 and can hang with big kids. My little cousin is 11 but she acts like a little kiddo sometimes so we count her in too...lol. I decided to do Frozen because my little sister LOVES it like all of the little girls in the world! I went to Wal-Mart to purchase party tabkeware and decor to match the theme, made the cake myself and her parents ordered some pizza and wings. We ended up spending no more than $50.00 for the party which was awesome and I know that my sister thoroughly enjoyed herself. If I had more time I am sure I would have went all out with the decorations and sweets but she loved all of it so that made me happy!

Lavish parties are the thing now but I don't think that they aren't always necessary. Pick a theme, go to Wal-Mart/Target/Party City and grab a few things, cook or order Pizza, get a cake, invite family and/or a few friends and your little one will have a ball! My family is fortunate in the bakery department because they know that they can always get a custom creation for just about free to match their theme but seriously, it's the thought and effort that counts. Celebrating my birthday as a kid always made me feel special. It was my personal day and I have nothing but great memories of it! I plan on doing the same for my sister & daughter.

My Nylah and my sister posing in front of a Frozen backdrop.

The birthday girl!

Table set-up!

The birthday cake!

My Nylah & Her Daddy having cake (silly big cousin in the background).

Birthday girl having cake!

Birthday girl & her big cousin.

My godson came to join the party too!

Nylah's Royal 1st Birthday Bash!

Our baby girl turned 1 on March 30, 2015 and it was a HUGE deal!!! I love first birthdays. They are just so precious so of course my Nylah had to have an awesome 1st birthday! At first, we debated about having the party at a place or at home but we decided to rent a spot because our house would get pretty crowded between our two families alone. I didn't plan on going all out but.....I just couldn't help myself. I went by my husband's quote; "You Only Turn One Once" and planned everything around those words...lol.

So on to some of the details! We rented the smallest room available at a restaurant/rental facility called Keya Graves located in Darby, PA (about 15 minutes from our house). On a Sunday, the room was $300 for 6 hours (great deal) and fit about 40 people. I was surprised to find that the room was actually a suite when I went to visit, which was a ton of space. We used the entrance room to store her gifts, one room for the table settings and sweet table and one room as a playroom! Her dad came up with the theme because he is always calling her a "Little Queen" so we came up with "Royalty". I made her cake, we ordered some pizza and chicken fingers and had lots of little things for our guests to do. I knew that I would have a lot to do so I hired a family friend to help with some of the decorations and I must say that she did an AMAZING job with Nylah's sweet table. Below are more details about the party.

Theme: Royalty
Colors : Pink and Gold
Number of Guests: 30
Food: Pizza and Chicken Fingers
Activities: Decorate your own Crown, Pinata, Dancing, Giant Balloon and Ball Fun!

All of the decor was pink & gold. My family friend did an amazing job!!

Here is the cake that I made for her!!

She got a lot of AWESOME gifts!

Guests decorating their own crowns. The number 1 on the table is actually a pinata that I also made.

Nylah & her auntie (my little sister) discussing something...lol

The birthday girl and Daddy

Our Little Queen!

We put down mats for our tiny guests to crawl around on

Daddy & the birthday girl in her gold outfit. 

Her birthday board that I also made.

The birthday girl's VIP seating.

Some of our early guests

Nylah & her grandmothers!

Update

Wow! It has been almost 7 long months since I last updated this blog and I must say that I am a terrible blogger...lol. So much has happened since December of 2014 that I would like to share. Our baby girl turned the big 1, I just celebrated 25 years of life, I started in a new position and so other little things..lol. I promise to get better with things because I love my life and I want to share it with the world!!!

Natural Hair Puff and Bun!

So, another thing you'll find out about me besides being a wife, mother and baker is that I am also a naturalista (a.k.a.) a black woman who stopped using chemical relaxers in her hair and has decided to wear her hair in it's natural state. I've been natural since 2010 and it definitely is a process. Waiting for your hair to grow the length that you want or trying out a style only to find out it didn't work out or your hair wasn't dry enough....soooo many issues but nonetheless, I love my hair! My hair is a little past my shoulders now and I am okay with this length but I of course want it longer.

I like to refer to myself as a lazy naturalista. I never feel like washing, conditioning or co-washing my hair. I don't style my hair often because two strand twisting or braiding takes too long. Or it's really uncomfortable to sleep with rods/flexi-rods/curlformers in your hair. I know that I have some issues and I promise to work on them...lol. Since I am so lazy you can often catch me wearing a variation of three styles; afro puff/bun, jumbo twist or braid out or two braids. This is a picture tutorial for my Afro Puff/Hair Bun.

1. I usually start off with an old twist out (about 3 days) but you can do this on freshly washed hair as well.
2. Apply a moisturizer (not too much to avoid residue in your hair) and gel (my favorite is ECO Styler).
3. Use a very stretchy headband. I wrap mine around my head twice to ensure tightness.
4. Pull headband up towards the middle of your head and pin it. This is where you stop if you want to wear       an Afro Puff.
5. Flatten your puff on all sides.
6. Take another stretchy headband and apply it over your flattened hair.
7. Pin any loose hairs into your bun and there you have it, a nice and neat bun! Doing this on stretched hair         (braided, twisted or straightened hair) will make your bun look fuller but it all depends on what you like.

And those are 2 of my favorite EASY natural hairstyles! I'll definitely make sure to post more picture tutorials! Toodles

Christmas 2014 - Baby's First Christmas!

The most wonderful time of the Year! It truly is. I just love Christmas. And I was even more excited this year because it was my daughter's 1st Christmas. I am going to admit now that we went totally nuts with her gifts! We couldn't help it. I gave very nice gifts to everyone, including some expensive sneakers for my other little sister whose birthday falls on Christmas Day!

I prepped my house for Christmas the day after Thanksgiving, I play no games when it comes to decorating for Christmas. The tree was up, the stocking hung and my window display complete! We let Nylah add the finishing touch to the tree, the giant bow on top. I don't do real trees. You can't keep them up as long, they have a weird shape and they leave behind too many pine needles...lol. She loved the tree; touching the lights, branches and ornaments. I got some great shots of her under the tree. We also made sure to watch Christmas movies together; Rudolph, Frosty the Snowman, Home Alone 1 & 2 and The Polar Express.

Now I'm going to spill the beans on the gifts that "Santa" bought Nylah. We watch the Sprout channel everyday in our house (Astroblast is Nylah's fav.) so we've had our feel of toy commercials for the holiday season. Aaron and I discussed early on what toys we thought would be great for Nylah and we came up with 3; Laugh and Learn Smart Stages Chair (she's a little to young for this one right now), Laugh and Learn Magical Musical Mirror and 3-in-1 Bounce, Stride and Ride Elephant. I'm a bit frugal so I started looking early for deals and ended up snagging all three toys from both a combination of Wal-Mart and Target at a discounted price. 

Nylah is a small little lady but she's finally grown out of 0-3 months at 8 months! So we knew that she needed a lot of new clothes. Her daddy is what I would like to call a fashionisto...lol. I look okay but I don;t really care about fashion. My hubby likes to look good and keeps up with what's in and what's not (I sound like an old lady). Anyways, we got her some pretty cute outfits from H&M, Gymboree, Old Navy, Carter's and OshKosh B'Gosh! She also got outfits from other family members so she has a whole new wardrobe which I am so happy about!! Reading is also important so she got two new books; Chicka Chicka Boom Boom and Five Little Monkeys Jumping On the Bed (which she LOVES)!! She got other gifts but I just don't feel like explaining it all. She had a great 1st Christmas and it was awesome watching her reaction to her gifts on Christmas morning!

Christmas Eve at her grandparents - Santa's Little Helper

She's such a happy baby! Posing here with some of her gifts on Christmas morning.

Hosting My First Thanksgiving

Okay, last year we had Thanksgiving at our house but I didn't prepare it. I was supposed to so my mom stayed over night and was supposed to help me along the way but she ended up doing everything because I was pregnant, tired and sick last year. So this year I wanted to do everything and I must say that everything turned out great! I was super nervous because I didn't think I was domesticated enough to prepare such a meal (I know, it's silly) but I was totally fine. It was also Nylah's first Thanksgiving so I thought it would be better if everyone came over instead of us taking her out and making rounds, Here is my menu;

Menu

Turkey

Ham

Baked Mac and Cheese

Homemade Mashed Potatoes

Collared Greens

String Beans

Cranberry Sauce

Dinner Rolls

Sweet Potato Pie

Cheesecake 

I was off the day before Thanksgiving so I had a good amount of time to prep. My mother-in-law gave us what I thought was a chicken months ago that I had stored in the freezer (I discovered that it was a turkey some time before Thanksgiving). I was nervous about making the turkey but I followed all instructions and it turned out great. I seasoned it and rubbed it all over with butter, put it in a bag and it came out juicy and tender! I purchased a ham and so did my mother-in-law so I let her make her ham and decided to save mine for Christmas (I just love keeping giant animals in my freezer...not really). My mac and cheese was prepared the day of and took not much effort to make. I peeled and chopped potatoes the night before and left them in cold water overnight. I threw them in my crockpot the next day for 4 hours. They softened and then I put them in my mixer to cream them down. I made fresh collard greens; chopped them up the night before and cleaned them. Left them in some water overnight (in the fridge) and cooked them the next day. My string beans and cranberry sauce were canned so that was easy! And we had yummy Hawaiian rolls!! I'm a baker so I of course had no issues with my pie and cheesecake. My mom also brought a homemade sweet potato pie as well. We just had some close family over; laughed, talked, watched football and watched my little sister perform songs from the movie "Frozen". It was a pretty awesome day!